


Falling In Love is the Easy Part

by santa_gay



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, M/M, Sad Grantaire, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 16:37:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20118214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/santa_gay/pseuds/santa_gay
Summary: It’s too easy to fall in love. Time and time again, Grantaire thinks he’s learned his lesson, and yet there’s always another glimpse of long blonde hair, gleaming blue eyes, and a passion that seems wasted on a man this hopeless.





	Falling In Love is the Easy Part

It’s too easy to fall in love. Time and time again, Grantaire thinks he’s learned his lesson, and yet there’s always another glimpse of long blonde hair, gleaming blue eyes, and a passion that seems wasted on a man this hopeless. 

Lately, the passion became less important. It wasn’t personality he was after; it was one night. One night where he could stroke golden locks, gaze into piercingly cold eyes, and caress bodies, shapes beneath him, shapes that were easily replaced by longing with his eyes closed. After all, eyes cold with the fury of being paid for such an unwanted job were eerily similar to eyes cold with the fury of revolution.

It’s been months, and this newfound habit of his was destroying him. His money was gone, his hands could no longer hold a paintbrush. It took all his effort to grasp his bottle and his women, and not once did the thought of coming out of his stupor cross his mind. Once there had been a reason to try. Long ago, he had believed in something, in someone. But that was before.

It hurt too much to say his name. He tried, sometimes, in the dark. Whispers of the man he believed in floated through his head, and the women would respond to any name with enough coin in their purse. It took too many nights of sending women out into the streets in shame as he dissolved into drink and tears before he admitted that his only love was irreplaceable.

Falling in love is easy, it’s true. Falling out of love is where Grantaire struggles. June 6th wasn’t just the end of a man, an angel, a beacon. It was the end of any hope Grantaire had for himself. Without Apollo, there was no reason to try. Now, months later, without any gold left to pay for cheap imitations of an angel, there was no reason to stay. 

His hands grasped for a bottle, any bottle. It was simply by lucky chance that he chose the laudanum on the first try. Maybe his angel was guiding him. Maybe his angel was whispering in his ear, letting him know the quickest way to be reunited. As he drained the last drop from the bottle, his final thought was of his Apollo, and how glad he would be to see him again.

In the corner of the Musain, a body slumped over a table, as the echo of a word escaped his lips. It was a word he hadn’t dared utter since June, and it was to be the last word he ever said. “Enjolras”, he whispered, and his eyes shut one last time.


End file.
